I love you.♥August 19, 2010♥ prev/next♥
Hey...
I just wanted to say to you (once again) that I truly truly love you with all my heart. When I'm at home half the time all I can do is sit and think about being with you, when it's time for me to do something I can't concentrate, and when I'm alone I ache for your arms around me.
It may be hard for you to believe, and I can't say that I even understand it myself, but I've fallen for you so hard it's like I can't get back up again.
You are the air in my lungs, keeping me alive. You're the dance my heart beats to, fulfilling my yearning soul.
When you're upset or sad or hurting I feel like the Earth itself has shattered, the sun won't shine, and the rain won't stop pouring, flooding everything everywhere. I feel my world fall apart and my heart drops a little in my chest.
And when you're happy or excited I feel like the world is a blur of boundless energy, bursting with a musical radiance of it's own, as if all the animals of the world want to dance and sing to me. The wind blows through the trees and they gesture hellos and I feel velvet hands brush my face. I feel warm, caressed, safe, loved.
Even sitting here now, just knowing that you're just downstairs makes me feel safe and content.
I love you. I know I keep saying that, but it's so much I don't even know how to express it all... it's unlike anything I've ever felt before. I feel such a strong need to make you understand, but it's so hard to put into words... and I don't even know it all myself, so I feel like I have to keep stressing it to you.
And what really nags at my heart is that I'm so fearful of loosing you again. You say you never stopped loving me, and yet even that didn't keep you from leaving. I'm so afraid of what I'm feeling because I don't want it to happen again. I don't want to mess up somehow, or make you annoyed, and make you leave. I love you so intensely that I don't even know what to do with myself... I feel all of this emotion inside of me running up higher than the stars, and since it's up that high, loosing you again would bring me crashing back down to the ground, and that's a very long fall.
I just really love you, so much.
I had to say it again.